Friday, 24 November 2017

Fun with Bev and Carol

Just to let you know I'm running a price promotion on all my humorous memoirs beginning on November 29th for five - seven days (depending on the ebook).  At the bottom of this post I've included a short extract from Bunny on a Bike so you can see whether you empathise with a rather easily distracted Bev as she undergoes a particularly challenging test to become a Playboy croupier.

There are four books in the Bev and Carol series (all but one are available in paperback too):




Here's the extract, where Bev and Carol take the second maths test included in the Playboy selection process:

More Maths (this time, ‘mental’)

Keith was right, there was more to come.

‘Please record your answers on the paper provided, clearly numbered and legibly written.  Take care to keep to the correct numbering.  You will hear the questions once and have ten seconds to calculate and note down your answer.’
We had made it through to the final hurdle.  There were twenty-seven of us left, which meant that seven of us would not get a job, according to a girl called Desdemona, who, apparently, hadn’t heard of a ‘geezer’ called Shakespeare.
Suddenly maths seemed more important.  I had scored ninety-five on the written maths test, one more than Carol. Result!  Keith had got eighty-three.

We were spaced out, spatially speaking, so that copying would be impossible this time, and I knew that I was on my own.  In some twisted way, this was invigorating as I felt, unjustifiably, that I was up to the challenge. I flexed my mental muscles and took a deep breath – oxygen to the brain, in lieu of a gin and tonic - memories of my French Oral exam at ‘O’ level came flooding back.  Carol gave me a look that said, ‘You have a bogey on the end of your nose.’  And I stared back with a, ‘Your right boob is more droopy than your left one.’  We were as relaxed as we could be under the circumstances and ready for the first question.

‘Question one.  Seven times nine?’
The numbers fed into my brain and it spoke to me: Easy peasy.  Ten sevens are seventy, less seven, means nine sevens are sixty-three.  It appeared that I had forgotten my nine times table.  Oh well, never mind.
‘Question two.  Eleven times thirteen?’
Bit more tricky. Ten thirteens are one hundred and thirty, plus thirteen, makes one hundred and forty-three.  Thank you brain. And so it went on.  After a few minutes, I heard a soft blubbing noise behind me, and Desdemona was led away by one of the assistants. One down, six to go.   I looked over to where Keith was sitting and he winked at me.  I stuck out my tongue and smiled broadly, waiting for the test to continue.

Friday, 10 November 2017

Goodreads Giveaway!

Goodreads Book Giveaway

My Grandfather's Eyes by B.A. Spicer

My Grandfather's Eyes

by B.A. Spicer

Giveaway ends November 29, 2017.
See the giveaway details at Goodreads.
Enter Giveaway

Wednesday, 8 November 2017

Free short story!

I have two offers running at the moment!  Can I tempt you to something new to read?

'Strings', a vintage sci fi short story, is free until 15th November:

View on Amazon

'My Grandfather's Eyes', mystery/psychological thriller, is just 99p/99c until 12th November:

View on Amazon

And while you're here...

My brand new paperback is now published!  'A Good Day for Jumping' has been described as intelligent, surprising and evocative.  Set in Greece, it follows the misadventures of Stephen Firth, a man of considerable wealth, who jilts his bride and runs to Crete, where he was brought up as a child.  The people he meets become more than just playthings and he begins to see that there is more to life than money and power.  'A Good Day for Jumping' is available as an ebook and in paperback.  

View book and reviews on Amazon